nothing but nothing

tsk! blgoger is so down. im reduced to editing my prev post to blog..
so it really is 031005, monday today.


meals are all screwed upside down..
jyingzz says maybe im stressed without knowing..

urgh. promos suck. cnt wait for it all to be over !!
although studying at the airport is secretly woohoo hahah.
but phi just overdid it la. whoever stays over at the airport for 2 nights?? totally treating it like our homes. haha. but we're not the only ones.. apparently freaky people who stare at people unnervingly and laugh to themselves in the toilet stay over too..
spotting of the Zac lookalike!
yea butttt..haha.
no seth cohens. alrightyyy im off.


tings hello I MISS YOU please..promos driving me nuts :/ i'll buy the card to call you soon! hope all is well :) <3 you.


By the way you brought me here,
It makes believe,
the best is still yet to come,
and I don't want to leave.
Forgive my hesitation but I'm learning to trust in you.
Help me to dream these dreams
because I don't have a clue.


favourite at the moment :)
thanks, c.
oh well.


ohmy cant believe i actually entertained the thought of being itsy bitsy sad whn promos end cos i'll miss study seshs. (??!?!) psychotic. okay take care and lucks, people.


-



sweetNOTHINGS

tings there are too many songs for us! but nonetheless yknw i <3 you so and I MISS YOUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i knw..so sorry about it..call me soon?? -sends you some mittens in the falling degrees. :) the ipod nano is COOL. DEAD COOL. lucky you! wht you gonna do with greenie poddie?

Pour me some wine, join me tonight
Surround me with your happy faces
Share some fun stories, stay up all night
Surround me with your friendly faces
Life is so good when I'm with you
I needed the laughs, I needed you tonight
life is so good when I'm with you
So look at me, when I'm not aware
Then you'll see, I cannot do without you
I'll be right there, if you ask me to
If you're feeling sad, I'll stay with you
And if you're scared, I'll hold your hand
Like I know you'd do for me too.

even if i made girllllllfriends (girlyyfriends),
know that i'll still need you. shalb!



Far away, I feel your beating heart
All alone, beneathe the crystal stars
Staring into space, what a lonely face
I'll try to find my place with you

What a Beautiful smile
Can I stay for a while
On this beautiful night
We'll make everything right


cos life's like this
and not at all seth-and-summer
and we're not marissa-and-summer
BUT yknw im alwayssss here -


i wanna hold your hand

this simple line!
miss you. till then, <3.

-


anywayyy a long expired account on the past week..

happy birthday REEraroo pls dont stay mad with me >:(
happy birthday SAMmiekins you poor decieved girl, but arent you glad all the same

:))

happy tidings during the surprise party!
blowing balloons + oily kitchen + drinks maker + fresh air + running around + changing in staircase corridors + stealing food + no money but free oreos + ALMOST leaking of news + the cousin and her tightfits + board making + ohmy the yummy food + pic taking ;; oreo ah focks, bright sparkles + the black sex songs + musical chairs to Fix You and blue black on my ass from the shoving + cabbing in the sleepy streetlights = FUN.


and many many attempts to escapades
resulting in 20cm scratch, muddy shoe (ohmy) being fetched out of school


accident-prone week
6 blue blacks, fever + flu, and the above mentioned 20cm scratch
sheesh..
how come its not mentioned in my horoscope readings!
yes fyi i do check it weekly.
haha
ok and ystd ws w phi the ultimate shopper..i was DYING of thirst, thank God for 40cents guardian mineral water. HAHA. wldve preferred our NTUC ice mountain secret though -looks at AMK kia. hahahha.


been thinking about karma alot and concluded that..


it prevails.



//EDIT 260905 mond
pops red signal
will the best friend call me pls :(

maybe its not about being alone, but feeling alone.

andand,
maybe i tried, maybe i didnt..

but being at a loss
all i want is to run to..
i dnt knw who anymore.
cos no one's at the receiving end anyway.

should i stay

:)

gp lesson
Midnight Talk
daddy's itsy sweetness
yummy food
bumping into mina (miss you!)
then bumping into don and etc.
overseas call from tinkerbell (albeit the contention this time :)
very conducive study location
nutty laughter, good times
neat hair day
waking up at 930a.m
choc! (peanut butter m&ms and ritter cornflakes anyone? :)
coldplay ; fix you


:(

completely weirded out, troubling, disturbing, awkward, uneasy afternoon and night (ystd)
sambal dishes = shitty stomach (pun! haha)
STRANGE & UNbeautiful
very erm haircut
all the 'catch up soon's from everyone
no swinging conversations with phi
sore throat
no strawberry milkshake
miscommunication with parents, or the lack thereof.
school.
I&R
promos


recently bumping into a lot of people.. like i havent seen nissa in more than half a year though she lives around me, but suddenly i saw her this morning. and etc etc. and its so coincidental tht whn i bump into people after such a long long time, im either carrying the same bag or the same tee i donned when we hung out. which is highly amazing if you dont think about the mighty embarrassing factor..its like the piecing of memory..! haha

and why why why are things this way?
tell me whyy~~
sigh feeling so crappy
time will not untie the knots i thought it would.. (this is so Twelfth Night)


Slower slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads

Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days (years)
Making up for all this mess



oh welllll.
off to do tht I&R.

/edit
ooh. oc was so aww.
:)

coldplay

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace

...

(finally the right song, jyingzz!!)

Students increased to grand total of 7!
Beams. Okay, don't know whether to beam or freak out..
kids are a handful! >:(

Steph! Your book was very :) indeed, made my day. (not night though)

I ought to stop being cheesy and play all the sappy ballads..
Inducing the wrong emotions at the peak of my happiness today.
Right-o.
So..you really just leave me be?

i am no solution
to this sound of dispollution in me
and i was not the answer so forget if you ever thought
it was me

people are beginning to feel like balls
bouncing and bounding off me
does that make me the wall?!

and people who dont understand..
really just dont..


been Fake Studying as the Dreamy one would put it
with nana (yummy food! but did study a tad),
ree (completely jst sleeping and not pretending to study at all),
steph (ahem I studied while she read a book!?!? but yes phi im reading the book now haha and sorry for deserting you tht day again despite your protests tht all you wanted to do was go home and sleep anywayy..andand i can foresee you sleeping now..your screwed up body clock is too much..!)
and other days with jiang, charm, mat and d..


hols are ending..still not in the study mood..
so dead!
but well..
had a nice conver with Tinkerbell (i miss you! will check out a+f website yes :)
and also Midnight talks with the two Psychotic and Dreamy ones..
poddie is ready for collection today!!!! 4 days early :D :D
gonna finally study a little more.

its in the little things.


oh my God
i dont know what to do with my wardrobe..
-looks at clothes with disdain.
tings and jyingz dnt laugh at me!

im not gonna let us fall apart

have you ever felt like everything's slipping off your fingers
like you missed your chance when you could hold them tight
but just after that splitting second, its over..?

i dont want to be this wayy
but somehow i always miss the very second
being caught up in my nothingness

sooo
to all the people
im so very sorry
all your smiling faces are popping up in my head
and with a jolt i suddenly realise
im missing out so much!!!!!!!!


BOOHOO.
-sings ;; what have i done..


the best tinkerbell ever! i will email you! and finally tell you everyth thts been on my mind

stephiphi!! MONDAY MONDAY, rational bimbo! and get well soon you sickly galsxz! 2 weeks mc!!?!!? btw am very very :))))))) tht you always bother to msg me though yes sometimes im very very lazy or forget to rply :(((((((

ree+nana tmrw FINALLY!

dada AFTER PROMOS?!?! miss you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we mst take lotsa photos!! all tht i have of you are like, in sec3?!?!

ele girlllll. seriously, an image of your fish burger drawing appears whn i think of you. BOLD YOU SO. hpe your leg gets welly well and we both have healthy throats can finally finally sit down in macs (but they closed dwn the wisma one yknw :( and laugh at black undies / pants matching black top. haha!

hwing MISS YOU TOOOOOOO!! anw did you msg me? saw your name but accidentally deleted bfore reading. haha you! after promos! lots to tell me! +all the cj people..don, jolene, etc etc sighsigh.

and maybe when we're 80 we'll sit around with ralph lauren pillows laugh about how we had bumps in our early years and brushed off our conflicts cos we wouldve overcome them.


realise this entry is uber psychotic and full of rambles
but yes, hit by sudden realisation
and my books too!
im sorry ive been ignoring you or pretending to read you! i will..try tmrw!


and all who were there / are here / whatever, am very :) !
hehh.
<3

im away from the world's empathy

recently been feeling like ive been wasting my time
going places, saying words, doing things im not entirely keen about..
but everything's making a turn for the worse all of a sudden,
i dont know what to make of it..

sigh.
weary and wary again.
i swear, all the gradual revelations are driving me up the wall.
cant things just be simple and fathomable for once..


today's just an awfully unsuccessful attempt to study AGAIN..
and well, a lot of minds whirring like running tracks.


promos are up and coming :(

my poddie's gone. i hope they recycle and not crush it!! poor baby..
the replacement will only be ready 2 weeks from now..
what am i to do without it?!??!!


had sore eyes ystd..
walking around half blind and uncomfortably.
after being so used to having a layer of contact lens in my eyes,
feel so sleepy without them all day and night..
they uncannily keep me more awake..

was an attempt to shop and everything..
in the end was a bit productive! :)
and and dinner was nice!! suki = new hangout place. hahah
going gaga over kids clothes, trying on nightie spag straps (looking so sick and porn-ish!), talking and talking and talking and..

late night talks are the best.
i so miss them. -looks at tings pointedly. I MISS YOU and your huang shang'r-ness! (though you wouldnt believe it :(

wting thrs so much i wnt to tell you but i dnt knw how and cant.. :( :( but yknw youre the loveliesttttttttt. will mail you again soon. hope all's :) over there! have some unbelievable news to tell you. i can imagine your jaw dropping..sigh. i miss just swinging by your place or leaving st nicks in the aftnn for crystal jade or fish and co pls..the simplicity of things then..


the sweetest things always come with daunting omens to wreck things up.
doesnt it just make you wonder what can we actually believe in??


rahh.
gp essay.

hmrpf!!!!
feel like just throwing everything aside and screaming i dont careeeeeeeee!
weirdly angstygalsxz. must be pms..